Help
Sign In
actions
February 2009 
How do you define integrity?
Posted on Jan 7th, 2008
by 
Tara
Tara
This is in Response to the Questions and Reflections for January 07, 2008:
Doing what you say you are going to do - for others AND for yourself.
I think that part of integrity is critical - because so many of us forget that keeping our words to ourselves actually has an enormous impact on whether your mind trusts you enough to manifest reality in the way that you desire.
It's that whole "leading by example" thing - if you had a leader in your life - like a boss or a coach - who said that they were going to do something and then never followed through, you would neither have much respect for that person, nor be willing to do what they asked of you.
In the same way, when you say that you are going to do something for yourself - like take better care of yoruself, say "no" when you mean no, or simply start speaking more kindly to yourself, but you never actually follow through on any of those things - then your mind won't respect you, and certainly will not want to follow what you ask of it.
In that case, you might say, "I want to manifest the life of my dreams," but your actions are the opposite - they are not to be trusted- then you are, from a frequency-standpoint, cancelling out that inherent desire to have a better life, and you will flow instead with a life that meets what your mind thinks you want - which may, if you are never doing what you say you are going to do for yourself, be chaos.
Definitely always keep your word to others - in as much as you possibly can - but do not forget the importance of keeping your word to yourself!!
Actually - my radio show for this week on GoodLIfe Radio is on being able to become a great leader of yourself - and sticking to your personal action plan for success!!
I think that part of integrity is critical - because so many of us forget that keeping our words to ourselves actually has an enormous impact on whether your mind trusts you enough to manifest reality in the way that you desire.
It's that whole "leading by example" thing - if you had a leader in your life - like a boss or a coach - who said that they were going to do something and then never followed through, you would neither have much respect for that person, nor be willing to do what they asked of you.
In the same way, when you say that you are going to do something for yourself - like take better care of yoruself, say "no" when you mean no, or simply start speaking more kindly to yourself, but you never actually follow through on any of those things - then your mind won't respect you, and certainly will not want to follow what you ask of it.
In that case, you might say, "I want to manifest the life of my dreams," but your actions are the opposite - they are not to be trusted- then you are, from a frequency-standpoint, cancelling out that inherent desire to have a better life, and you will flow instead with a life that meets what your mind thinks you want - which may, if you are never doing what you say you are going to do for yourself, be chaos.
Definitely always keep your word to others - in as much as you possibly can - but do not forget the importance of keeping your word to yourself!!
Actually - my radio show for this week on GoodLIfe Radio is on being able to become a great leader of yourself - and sticking to your personal action plan for success!!
Access: Public
Tara,
Thank you for sharing this. Integrity is such an important value to me, as it underscores Trust which is also so important to me.
I'm blessed to be surrounded by people I TRUST, but I know that this has shifted since I embraced integrity as one of my key values and began to practice it daily.
Not always perfect - I think I'm procrastinating a bit on some of the things I'd like to do, but once I state that I'm going to do something - particularly for another - I keep my agreement, or I renegotiate it.
This is something I'm trying to teach my son - that it's ok to shift, change….but it's important to renegotiate agreements in order to maintain integrity and to have others TRUST you.
Hi Tara,
I like everything you say about integrity including being true to yourself and to others, and doing what you say you would do – keeping promises to yourself, as well as to others.
Integrity is a huge thing for me as well, and is actually the core of my writing project that led me to participate in Laure and Tana's women writers' circle. Thank you again for all the fantastic information you shared with us on Wednesday's call!
For me, integrity includes that alignment with self – it is also overwhelmingly about how we treat and deal with others. Everything in life comes down to relationships – and not just with people with whom we are close, or friendly. It includes the “jerk” who cut us off on the highway! What we do next demonstrates our view of temporal relationships, and our integrity.
Integrity ultimately asks us to look at the hard questions: How do we handle the great tests in life? Keeping our integrity is easy when the stakes are low. What about when the stakes are high? When we are negotiating a big deal, one that is critical for our career? What about when our life, or that of someone we love, is at risk? What choices will we make?
As Laura says, we are not always perfect. I see integrity as an aspirational goal: the more i work to reach it, the closer I get. Alignment is key; perfection is elusive. Even rockets sent on their way to the moon are only on target 80% of the time. They have built-in self-correctlng mechanisms that bring them back on track.
So, developing mechanisms, tools, reminders, that help us self-correct and re-align ourselves, is critical to success with integrity.
BTW, my Zadz name – Kimbotu – came to me during a spirit naming exercise a Passion and Power retreat I attended with Lori-Ann Demers a few years ago. The word that was chosen to represent me is Integrity. ;D
Hi Carrie!
Thank you so much for your incredibly thoughful reply to my posting! What a great perspective - and I LOVE the image you use of the rocket ship being on target only 80% of the time - and having a self-correcting mechanism to keep it on track.
I think that our self-correcting mechanism - which you alude to - is our personal conscious awareness of our thoughts and actions on a moment by moment basis….when we become aware of being exactly who we say that we are - or that we wish to be - in every moment, then we are truly showing integrity. And you are right - that comes down to not only big things like making career decisions and negotiating big deals - but also to little things, such as our reactions to someone who cuts us off.
This is a great reminder for me today, as I have some negotiating to do on some career things in the next few days, and it is a reminder of being who I intend myself to be is the only sure path to take.
Thank you so much for being on the call, and please do let me know if you ever need to bounce ideas off of me…
Have a wonderful day!!
:o) Tara
Hi Tara,
Thank you! And I extend the offer of bouncing ideas back to you – my expertise is in negotiation (and managing conflict), so if you'd like a bouncing pad for your negotiation strategy, feel free to ask!
;D
Carrie
Hi Carrie!
Somehow I missed this message - but thank you so much for your offer. I will very likely take you up on that as I go along!!
By the way, did you sign up for the 40 Day Transformation Challenge? The reason I ask is that I have a “Carrie” who I can't get mail through to because the address is wrong…
If you think it is you, just send me a quick e-mail with your correct address, if you don't mind!!
:o)
Tara